1. Georgia asked for her glasses tonight. She asked for them. With no coaxing or coaching. She asked! She wanted to sit on the couch and snuggle with Dad before bed while watching Pink Panther--both kids really like this cartoon. Rainer liked it first, but Georgia has been way into it lately, I think in no small part because it's almost entirely action-based with few, if any, words. When she doesn't have her glasses on she needs to sit (or stand, as the case may be) very close to the TV in order to see it. So she asked for them when we suggested maybe watching an episode of the show. That feels like MAJOR progress! Mind, she still fights them and gives her teachers a hard time about them at school, but...I still think we're getting there! She GETS what they are for, she GETS that she needs them. She is better about wearing them for things like TV-watching, and playing outside.
2. Rainer, before I leave for any one of my various meetings during the week won't ever let me leave without hugging and kissing everyone goodbye. I don't ever intend to leave without saying goodbye, but he jumps in as soon as I put my jacket on or grab my pocketbook and says things like "Don't forget kisses!" And if he didn't actually SEE me kiss Georgia or Alex he'll say "Don't forget Georgia! Don't forget Daddy!" Usually I go back and kiss everyone again because...why the heck not, right? I love that he does this. I also love that when he says "What about kisses and hugs?" he pronounces it "KIsses & Hug-es" with two syllables on each word.
3. Georgia and Alex are both still coughing from their pneumonia and bronchitis respectively, but thankfully they are both at at least 90% health for the first time in AGES! I say this not, I hope, to jinx it, but to rejoice.
4. Speaking of rejoicing, I recently told some friends that things are typically rather difficult for Georgia. I am not talking about DS exactly, because really, I am comparing her to everyone, including other kids with DS. It just SOMETIMES seems, in my admittedly woe-is-me moments, that things just don't come easily for Georgia. MUCH of this (all of it??? Sometimes it feels that way.) stems from the fact that she has an anxiety disorder and issues with sensory processing. I have to admit I have occasionally wished I had a child who fit the "always happy" DS stereotype. I mean, don't get me wrong, before anyone goes and lambasts me on that one, I KNOW we are lucky. I know it could be MUCH MUCH MUCH more difficult than it is for us, and I GET that a. it's not really about me, and b. we have it pretty good, and c. I really wouldn't want her to be anyone other than who she is, and d. well, lots of people tell me her strong-will and sass will serve her well one day, so let's hope that's right because I am banking on it. But the anxiety? Not a WHOLE lot of good can/has come of it.
It's been THE most difficult thing we've had to deal with. Harder than DS (10-fold) and in it's way, scarier than the heart stuff, too. ANYWAY, I am bouncing around.
What I am trying to get at is that recently I was bemoaning how difficult things tend to be for G--she's not a potty-learning superstar, she didn't walk super early, her speech is coming along, but it's still a struggle, etc etc...(God, typing this out, I kind of just want to throw a pie in my own face or something, because it makes me sound like a world-class a-hole.)
The thing is. I think G is AWESOME! I think she has accomplished TONS of stuff and she is well on her way to accomplishing SO MUCH MORE. More than I can even imagine. I KNOW this. I BELIEVE this. It's just sometimes, I wish she didn't have to work SO HARD all the time. I wish she could just be handed something. I wish I could be sitting around with my other DS mamas and tell the story like this "Yeah, we were expecting glasses to be a real struggle, but she just...got it. Immediately. No struggle." ha! Does that happen for ANYONE??? (Don't tell me if it happened to you. I am too busy being a sore sport.)
So I told my friends that one day if she ever IS handed something I will either a. rejoice and sing and do backflips, or b. I won't even notice. Because, come on...we, as humans, can...sometimes...tend to see the worst in things, and not notice the good stuff. Or the...regular stuff that is actually GREAT if you put the right spin on it.
My friend and I joked about that. Yeah, I probably wouldn't even notice.
Well, I am here to say, I did! I noticed! G went to the dentist this weekend and...other than the kicking and screaming and the next time you have to come when other patients aren't around sort of message we were given. (Oh Lord, I love me some anxiety tantrums at 9 o'clock on a Saturday morning. You know, one of those tantrums that has the hygienists running for the dentist??) ANYHOOOOOOOOOoooo....
Besides all that crap. Georgia's teeth got a delightfully boring clean bill of health. Nothing unusual to report. Looking good. Alls well. See ya' in six months.
Granted, this is her baby teeth, and I have certainly just jinxed her adult teeth. But. I'll take this momentary blessing! I am proud to say I noticed.
Thank you. Thank you teeth gnomes, or whomever heard my prayers that something be easy and boring for my gal.
Don't be so hard on yourself! We can't just extoll the great things but really there are downsides to any kid and life IS a bit harder based on each kids issues so hugs and it's okay- WE know that you adore her. Anxiety is very hard to deal with. Kayli has these irrational anxieties around dogs, certain people, loud noises, hot water and(naturally enough) medical stuff. We have taught her, successfully, breathing and counting to calm herself down (mostly works). We do a HUGE amount of prep if we know something is coming (we practice IV's ex, we bring earlpugs for loud movies etc. We basically desensitize her like it is a full time job!
Posted by: starrlife | 2012.01.12 at 12:41 PM
I think it's particularly challenging for moms of kids with disabilities. I feel like my mom-friends who have typical kids have some space to complain, but I feel wary of complaining--in part because I think my complaints will be understood as because of Down syndrome, and I'm supposed to be the 100% advocate. And like you, I've found that almost all the things I want to complain about have NOTHING to do with Down syndrome.
We need room to complain and for that not to be held against us or our kids.
Posted by: Alison | 2012.01.12 at 02:28 PM