Unringing the Bell

A Lover & a Fighter

Rainer is a lover. He is constantly, randomly, exclaiming, "I just loves ya, Mama!" and "I really, really love you!"

He won't let anyone leave without kisses and hugs for everyone. Included kisses and hugs for yourself.

During the day he or I will say to the other, "Guess what?" "What?" the other will say. To which one replies, "I love you and I like you."It's become our little catchphrase and we've even written a song for it.

As a result of this love fest, Georgia has learned how to really pucker up when she kisses. For her part, anytime you enter a room she will say, "Hi, Mom!" or "Hi, Dad!" and give a little wave. And the once aloof little lady has become a full-body hugger. She's a lover, too.

She's also a fighter.

It's true, she is much happier lately. In general. It is SUCH a relief. DS stereotypes be damned, because my gal is not always happy. Though, thankfully, she is getting happier. Calmer. More relaxed.

I love watching her when she doesn't realize anyone is looking. She has a curious way of interacting with the world, though she gets so frustrated with things. Today, at a friend's house, she was setting up a drum set. She was trying to fix the kick stand for the bass drum because it had fallen over. She tried about ten times, but just couldn't get it to sit right. If it was upright it was facing the wrong direction, if it was facing the right direction it was upside down. Eventually she just knocked the whole drum set over and walked away, like the best impersonation of a badass drummer at the finale of a set.

I can see how, if you didn't see what led up to the destruction, one might think she was simply being impulsive, or a brute. But she's FRUSTRATED. I don't know if it's the lack of fine motor coordination, sensory dysfunction, or, more than likely, a combination of factors, but she has a very difficult time with these seemingly simply tasks. And it infuriates her. I totally understand it. I would be mad, too.

That's why, when I am spying on her, say through the little window in the door to her religious education class, and I see her knock a chair over five times, and then each time diligently pick it back up (in itself no small task) to try and push it under the table again (even though it keeps getting over turned when the little feet get stuck on the low rug), I can't help but feel my heart in my throat while doing a little rah-rah-you-can-do-it cheer inside my head while I watch her.

I've been noticing that I've had a few more victory dances lately when I get witness her accomplish these not-so-little tasks.She's building upon her skills, and starting to want to perservere more. She's trying and trying again. She is the little engine that could personified.

She's a tough cookie that one. She doesn't always get the credit she deserves. She can be very misunderstood. She's been called stubborn, willful, impulsive, destructive, impatient.

But the more her patience grows, the more I get to see that she's kicking ass and taking names.

Something-Something

I have come here to write approximately 700 times since my last post and I just never know what to say. So this is going to be a picture post. A segue. I hope it will be enough to get me passed the inability to post.

I cut G's hair.

This is what it looked like a few days ago.

I'd been threatening to cut it for weeks. For some reason I was putting it off. I think I am growing more sentimental in my thirties! (Didn't know that was possible, I am sort of a sap already.) But I knew it needed to be done. The thought was becoming pervasive. She spent so much of her time with her hair wound tightly in a bun or in Laura Ingalls Wilder-style braids just to keep it out of her face.

It was getting hard to manage, and it was WAY too long for her to manage at all. It looked GORGEOUS when it was down, but she could only really wear it down after baths for an hour or so before I would need to braid it or put it up before bed lest she wake up with a real problem on her head!

I am so glad I did it. While I was quite fond of her braids, it was getting too unmanageable. It would go into into her sleeves when she was dressing and it was a doozy to keep clean when she had a runny nose or ate almost anything. Same old story. It's not like it's the first time I've cut her hair or anything. Her hair grows fast!

I am not even one of those "a girl's hair must be long" people. I have short hair. Spent much of my childhood with short hair that I asked for myself. So. I must just be a little wacky-woo-woo lately. I wasn't really looking forward to the actual cutting, either, because it's never been one of G's favorite things (to put it lightly) in the past, but I have to tell you she didn't fight or make a peep (thank you, iPod).

I decided to just take a little off this time. That's new for me. I am usually an all or nothing gal. If you're going to cut it, cut it. And all that. But, my first cuts came out pretty well and I coud tell it was more manageable instantly. So I decided to sit on it (like G could practiacally do with it already) for a few days and see what we think. When the pool opens up, I think I'll go shorter. It's just so much easier when she's in the water to have shorter hair. Maybe I'll give her another bob then, but for now, it's still fairly long. Especially considering I cut 6-8 inches off!

(There, I did it, I came out from blog hiding.)

Rainbowsaurus

Rainer was putting his hands in the light of this rainbow and smelling his fingers.

I said "Whatcha' doin?"

He said "Smelling rainbows."

"What do they smell like?" I asked. His answer?

"Dinosaurs."

Rainerisms

I have no idea if he understood the question, but tonight before bed I asked Rainer if he wanted to have kids one day. His answer?

"Ummm. No...they're kind of...kind of...ummm...too much."

ha! Yeah, tell me about it!

Let me just dive in here...

1. Georgia asked for her glasses tonight. She asked for them. With no coaxing or coaching. She asked! She wanted to sit on the couch and snuggle with Dad before bed while watching Pink Panther--both kids really like this cartoon. Rainer liked it first, but Georgia has been way into it lately, I think in no small part because it's almost entirely action-based with few, if any, words. When she doesn't have her glasses on she needs to sit (or stand, as the case may be) very close to the TV in order to see it. So she asked for them when we suggested maybe watching an episode of the show. That feels like MAJOR progress! Mind, she still fights them and gives her teachers a hard time about them at school, but...I still think we're getting there! She GETS what they are for, she GETS that she needs them. She is better about wearing them for things like TV-watching, and playing outside.

2. Rainer, before I leave for any one of my various meetings during the week won't ever let me leave without hugging and kissing everyone goodbye. I don't ever intend to leave without saying goodbye, but he jumps in as soon as I put my jacket on or grab my pocketbook and says things like "Don't forget kisses!" And if he didn't actually SEE me kiss Georgia or Alex he'll say "Don't forget Georgia! Don't forget Daddy!" Usually I go back and kiss everyone again because...why the heck not, right? I love that he does this. I also love that when he says "What about kisses and hugs?" he pronounces it "KIsses & Hug-es" with two syllables on each word.

3. Georgia and Alex are both still coughing from their pneumonia and bronchitis respectively, but thankfully they are both at at least 90% health for the first time in AGES! I say this not, I hope, to jinx it, but to rejoice.

4. Speaking of rejoicing, I recently told some friends that things are typically rather difficult for Georgia. I am not talking about DS exactly, because really, I am comparing her to everyone, including other kids with DS. It just SOMETIMES seems, in my admittedly woe-is-me moments, that things just don't come easily for Georgia. MUCH of this (all of it??? Sometimes it feels that way.) stems from the fact that she has an anxiety disorder and issues with sensory processing. I have to admit I have occasionally wished I had a child who fit the "always happy" DS stereotype. I mean, don't get me wrong, before anyone goes and lambasts me on that one, I KNOW we are lucky. I know it could be MUCH MUCH MUCH more difficult than it is for us, and I GET that a. it's not really about me, and b. we have it pretty good, and c. I really wouldn't want her to be anyone other than who she is, and d. well, lots of people tell me her strong-will and sass will serve her well one day, so let's hope that's right because I am banking on it. But the anxiety? Not a WHOLE lot of good can/has come of it.

It's been THE most difficult thing we've had to deal with. Harder than DS (10-fold) and in it's way, scarier than the heart stuff, too. ANYWAY,  I am bouncing around.

What I am trying to get at is that recently I was bemoaning how difficult things tend to be for G--she's not a potty-learning superstar, she didn't walk super early, her speech is coming along, but it's still a struggle, etc etc...(God, typing this out, I kind of just want to throw a pie in my own face or something, because it makes me sound like a world-class a-hole.)

The thing is. I think G is AWESOME! I think she has accomplished TONS of stuff and she is well on her way to accomplishing SO MUCH MORE. More than I can even imagine. I KNOW this. I BELIEVE this. It's just sometimes, I wish she didn't have to work SO HARD all the time. I wish she could just be handed something. I wish I could be sitting around with my other DS mamas and tell the story like this "Yeah, we were expecting glasses to be a real struggle, but she just...got it. Immediately. No struggle." ha! Does that happen for ANYONE??? (Don't tell me if it happened to you. I am too busy being a sore sport.)

So I told my friends that one day if she ever IS handed something I will either a. rejoice and sing and do backflips, or b. I won't even notice. Because, come on...we, as humans, can...sometimes...tend to see the worst in things, and not notice the good stuff. Or the...regular stuff that is actually GREAT if you put the right spin on it.

My friend and I joked about that. Yeah, I probably wouldn't even notice.

Well, I am here to say, I did! I noticed! G went to the dentist this weekend and...other than the kicking and screaming and the next time you have to come when other patients aren't around sort of message we were given. (Oh Lord, I love me some anxiety tantrums at 9 o'clock on a Saturday morning. You know, one of those tantrums that has the hygienists running for the dentist??) ANYHOOOOOOOOOoooo....

Besides all that crap. Georgia's teeth got a delightfully boring clean bill of health. Nothing unusual to report. Looking good. Alls well. See ya' in six months.

Granted, this is her baby teeth, and I have certainly just jinxed her adult teeth. But. I'll take this momentary blessing! I am proud to say I noticed.

Thank you. Thank you teeth gnomes, or whomever heard my prayers that something be easy and boring for my gal.